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Introduction

My Connie

 

“My Connie,– truly, an extremely rare, priceless, precious destiny and a special gift from God to me—we were “two bodies with one soul.” Before starting this biography of our true love, I have to give my highest tribute to my Connie and how she became an immortal love for me, a love that will, perhaps, be immortal for us both. I write this book to share my love and to give maximum credit to Connie for this love, for destiny, and evergreen lifelong love. This book, with valuable messages about the nature of love, is a creation of the love and hope and faith we shared. Imagining this destiny and love is the only comfort I have left. I had never realized how life can be changed by love, and through my devotion in fulfilling Connie’s desires, I am sure God would fulfill my wish and hers. Perhaps it is a difficult test of life, an exam we had to face in order to pass again with a Gold Medal in our next love. In this book, I examine how destiny and love and have shaped the course of my life.

Hauntingly Disturbing Pain Every Moment

It is extremely important to mention that Connie’s demise is the most painful and is in my mind every moment of my day and night. Even before sleeping, when I dream, and when I get up, pain and thoughts are wandering in my brain. I feel like I am dreaming, but then I wake up, and I start to think so much and face reality and my life. mphasize that Connie’s love is in my mind every minute of the day, except when I am sleeping. However, the moment I am up, my pain is extreme. In addition to thinking about her, I am still avoiding reality and don’t want to believe at all that Connie darling has left me. I then go through the pain and it upsets my mind, body, and soul. I don’t know what to do and how to cope up. I start looking at her pictures and videos and her computer, chair, walker, and whatnot. I can’t think if I am getting peace of mind or more pain. But then I try to compromise by praying at her pictures and touching her chair, her computer and walker. That gives me some peace mixed with pain, and the lights in her study room are a small solace. It still looks as I am on a business trip and would be with her on Friday. I was dreaming that she is no more, which took my pain to extreme. That time I was totally in a world of thoughts, specifically, how intelligent, intercultural, and intellectual she was. I have never met any wife like that. I have compared too many of my family and friends, but I can’t find anyone like her. I then suffer from extreme unbearable pain. I go in deep thoughts and stops whatever it is I am doing for a short time or even for a long time. I then have to force myself to concentrate on the things I was doing or was planning to do. This much distraction is due to our love, but love we had for each other. After that, I want to be alone and be isolated. I read one quote, “Life asked death, why people love me, but hate you? Death responded, because you are a beautiful life, and I’m a painful truth.” Yes, it is the most painful, unexpected, and unbelievable thing. I’ve always wondered why God didn’t grant one thing and didn’t hear my prayers. Is God so cruel to his followers that He doesn’t listen to my prayers and my friend’s prayers? These things are still rattling in my mind, and it is so painful, specifically when you love someone so much.